Family mediation

illustration for Family mediation

Family mediation is a way of sorting out financial and children arrangements after separation or divorce without going to court. You make the decisions with the mediator's guidance and help.

Why consider family mediation? 

  • It allows you and your partner to deal with the consequences of your separation on your own terms rather than handing control over to a judge
  • It helps you communicate more effectively during and after your divorce
  • It's cost-effective, especially when compared to going to court

How does divorce mediation work? 

  • There are a number of different mediation models. Usually you meet as a couple with the mediator without lawyers in the room, but lawyer assisted mediation is an option. Some mediators are qualified to see children so their views can be fed back into your discussions.
  • Mediators manage the process and help guide your discussions by identifying and exploring any issues to give you the best chance of agreeing everything.
  • Mediators are impartial. They cannot give legal advice, but can explain what's legally possible and how other couples may have resolved things in similar circumstances.
  • When you've reached a mediation agreement in principle, the mediator prepares a summary (often called a “Memorandum of Understanding”), which isn't binding until you've had the chance to take independent legal advice. Your lawyer may need to prepare a formal order for court approval to give the agreement legal power.

Our experience

Mediation is a really effective and lower-cost choice for many couples. That's why, with some exceptions (for example where it's unsafe because of domestic abuse), before making a court application, you usually need to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) to explore mediation and other out-of-court options. Too often, family lawyers see this as a tick-box exercise. We're different.

Whether we're acting as lawyer mediators or supporting you through the process as independent advisers, we believe passionately that mediation can succeed even in cases that are complex or where agreement might initially seem impossible.

Between them, the lawyer mediators in our seven offices across the country have the qualifications and experience to offer the full range of family mediation services including where there are international issues. 

Our recent mediation work includes:

  • A mediation for parents following court proceedings about enforcing an order for child arrangements
  • A lawyer-assisted financial mediation in Jersey
  • A complex prenuptial agreement with assets around £50m
  • A high conflict mediation where initially the couple couldn't be in the same room together
  • Mediating in a case involving an entrepreneur with complicated business assets

The Mills & Reeve family team has unrivalled mediation expertise.

Ready to talk to us?

Our team of specialist family lawyer mediators are here to support you if you're considering family mediation. Speak to our team today. 

Our lawyers

Resources

Explaining family law podcast

Facing a family law issue and not sure what's involved? Our podcast is the right place to start.

Family and children blog

Our family and children law blog provides practical advice and insight on a wide range of topics by our family and children lawyers.

Family law vlogger YouTube

On our YouTube channel, Caitlin Jenkins, the Family Law Vlogger gives you guidance on your first step in sorting out your issues.

Family mediation FAQs

Mediation is a way of reaching an agreement on the full range of issues that result from a divorce without handing over responsibility to a court. On the financial side, this might be splitting the assets, for example how the house is divided or pension sharing. When it comes to children arrangements it will often be the best approach to agreeing the time they spend with each of you and how you're going to make decisions jointly.

The great advantage of mediation is that you and your ex remain in control of all the discussions and the ability to find answers together to the problems you're facing will stand you in good stead as parents in the years ahead.

Going to mediation isn't compulsory but taking steps to find out about it is required in most cases before making an application to court for a financial order or in respect of the arrangements for your children.

If you're not able to reach agreement in mediation you can ask a court, or in most cases an arbitrator, to make a decision. Your negotiations and proposals in mediation cannot be referred to in subsequent proceedings although any factual information or documents you've provided can be.

Mediation is a voluntary process. It moves at the pace that suits both of you. You discuss everything in meetings together with the mediator and how long it takes will depend on how many issues you're looking to cover, how complex they are and how far apart you are on agreeing them.

“MIAM” stands for mediation information assessment meeting. Contrary to its name, it’s an opportunity for those contemplating court action to learn about all of the non-court dispute resolution approaches, not just mediation, in a bid to avoid expensive and confrontational litigation which does little to support separating families. 

If you are thinking about starting court proceedings (or at the receiving end of an application brought by your ex), don’t be scared of attending a MIAM. All non-court dispute resolution approaches are voluntary, so attendance will not mean you will be forced to mediate or prevent you from starting court proceedings at a later date. MIAMs can be arranged quickly and can even be undertaken remotely.

Contact our team today

Please fill in the form with your details and a member of our team will be in touch soon.

Speech Bubble
We need a partner/spouse name so we can run internal conflict checks